| Things were peaceful little too peaceful, if his
instincts told him any
better. However, the dead do not have instincts, but he had been
on the Lexx
long enough to know when the proverbial storm was going to arrive-along
the expected trouble that followed right behind it. He should
the calm of it while it lasted, if he could feel calm or any emotion
He did feel something though-felt that it was time for another fix,
that's where he was heading. To get another borrowed fix of life
woman that tried to kill him, but that was the past. Now she
serves only as
a hybrid dispenser to give him some extra "borrowed time".
Experiencing a small bit of weakness in him, he increased his pace
cryo room, but ran into a small and unexpected stop along the way.
It was their robot helper-or rather what was left
of it-790, who was
looking over said substance to see if it was really safe for him but
was mostly just curious about the stuff. It usually called Kai
over when a
new discovery was found and as usual the assassin would listen and
all in, but now was not a good time for either one of them. Going
the lab slowly, Kai looked at the robot head first then before glancing
the screen, looking at miscroscopic version of the donors DNA codes,
was not very interesting to him or the rest of the crew except for
seemed more prone to enjoy that sort of stuff, but didn't seem that
the moment .
"790...I take it you found something new again?"
"Of course I have. I wouldn't have called
you here if I didn't."
"What have you found, robot?"
"That they're may be some long term side effects
after all, dead boy."
"Unknown...it's rather hard to tell when you're
looking at the DNA
patterns of several different species. There are some praying
widow, chameleon like reptiles from several planets, including the
Gigashadow-which explains how and why she can bleed the stuff-along
others that I can't place or don't know about."
"You have mentioned that before."
"I know, I just wanted to say that as scary as it
was, The Divine Order
did some good work."
"You have also mentioned that before."
"Show off. Other than that, nothing's new.
Just thought I'd let you
"Have you been able to determine what race her human
DNA came from?"
"No, not yet. That's the only minor detail
I haven't clawed out yet.
I've narrowed it down but with a little more time and some more of
I may be close to it."
"I am heading over there right now. I am in
need of some more. I could
get some for you as well."
"Yes", he responded as he started to walk away.
"Thanks. I owe you one."
Moving quicker than before, he resumed his way back
to the cryo room,
knowing he would have to hurry again before he started to shut down-and
experience, he knew that's not what he wanted. Knowing that he
was close, he
readied his brace to prepare for the extraction-but ending up scaring
else in the process, as he bumped into another one of his crew mates
"Whoa! Geez, Kai, don't scare me like that."
"I am sorry, Xev", he replied, retracting his brace,
"but I must be
going. I need to head to her cryo chamber and get more for me
and a little
for 790. It is time for it."
"Oh...I'm sorry. Mind if I walk with you then?"
"No, I do not mind", he responded, walking away
again with her quickly
joining him there after, "have we found anything new yet?"
"No, nothing. It seems there's just nothing
there but empty space. I'm
getting really bored out here. I just hope we find something
soon before we
all go crazy from it."
"I do not go crazy."
"I know that, but we of the living do."
"I've noticed. If you do find anything of
interest though, let me know.
After I am done extracting more blood from our frozen captive, I plan
until you do."
"I understand...but Kai", she said, stopping him
as she stood still to
face him, "with all this emptiness going on right now outside...I'm
afraid of what we could find...afraid that it could be the worst one
Are...are you a little worried about all of this?"
"No...but if I could feel it, then I
probably would be as well."
"Thanks...that makes me feel a little better", she
replied starting to
walk with him again until they reached his destination, "here you are.
talk to you later."
"What will you be doing until then, Xev?"
"Oh, I don't know...probably finding the best ways
to kill the time, I
"Good luck on that then."
"Thanks", she replied as she walked out, "see you
Letting off a small nod in response, he went inside
and readied his brace
once more, heading toward to the control panel to wake their "guest"
was yet again rudely interrupted, this time by their captain, who as
Kai had no idea why he was there in the first place.
"Stanley", he asked, tapping him on the shoulder
lightly to grab his
attention but scaring him once again in the process when the living
his brace sticking out at him once again.
"Ah! Don't do that, Kai. The first time
scared me enough."
"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be
on the bridge?"
"Yeah, but I figured since I had nothing to do there
and since this puppy
needed a little tweaking, I thought I'd come over here and fix it",
replied, tapping the control panel.
"I do not think it needed fixing in the first place
since it has been
active as of late."
"Well, excuse me. So, what brings you here-no,
let me guess? You
jonesing for another fix?"
"Yes, I need some more...I am almost out."
"Well, why didn't you say so? Just let me
get this thing running, and
I'll wake her-"
As their bumbling but noble captain started to reach
for the control, the
both of them started to involuntarily rock to the side, thanks to the
working on it's own and changing course somewhere to the side-grabbing
their attentions and curiosities but also making Stanley a little peeved
"Ugggh! I know the Lexx is still a little
hungry, but what does it want
"Maybe you should go find out."
"Yeah, maybe I'll take the head with me since it's
probably got nothing
better to do either. I'll just get the controls for you-"
"That is not necessary. I can do that."
"Fine...fine, whatever. Go ahead. I
don't care. I know you want to
spend the time between you two alone."
"I do not want anything, living man", he responded
coldly to Stanley.
"Fine...sure, be that way. Deny it...I believe
you", he replied with a
smirk before heading out of sight and out of mind-at least for the
Moving slowly and closely to the cryo pod before
controllers, something slightly different came over him once more as
gently raised his cold, dead hand and slowly wiped it across the glass
reveal a beautiful but cold face underneath, which was that of a young
woman's. Her eyes were closed but everything about her physically (except
the rip on her rubber suit over her heart, but he didn't count that)
still exactly the same as the day they forced her in there
unconscious...after he crushed her heart with his brace before doing
so...after he just barely saved his own life and that of his friends
tried to destroy them all before changing her mind. He did regret
to her, but for completely different reasons than usual...reasons he
entirely understand and would rather not explain. He did not
know much about
her, but he did know her name. Her
name was Jaina, and she had become their prisoner-and his blood supply.
Glancing at her cold and empty face once more, he
turned around and
headed toward the controls, working over to activate the machine before
heading back to the pod more quickly than usual, for she would wake
instantly after he did and he could not put himself and the others
more danger again. He also had a more personal and merciful reason
though...he didn't want her to feel any pain over what he was going
to do to
her, even though they had been though it before many times. As
the door slid
upward slowly, he readied his brace and placed it at her throat, grabbing
small jar along the way while the smoked cleared out. Quickly
raising the brace, he slit her throat mercifully before she had the
wake up, the sacred protoblood flowing from it like water; but in reality
that was just a distraction, something to keep her regenerative abilities
busy while he drained more of it our of her right arm, the small jar
machine pumping and draining it out of her slowly as the wound on her
already began to heal.
Expecting as such, he made the machine go quicker
until he received the
amount he needed before setting it aside and then ever so gently laid
back against the coffin like pod, stroking her cold face gently with
of his hand then heading back to the controls to close it, glancing
the whole time as the lid lowered down over her...all of it done mercifully
and without waking her. He was proud of and for that. Placing
against the glass one last time before he headed to his own cryo pod,
opened it up and attached the needle the working on his chest, filling
him up with the protoblood he needed (just in case Stan and Xev call
unexpectidly, that way he could be ready for anything) before climbing
inside, the lid slowly closing on him now too. As he waited for
the cold fog
to take over him once more, he started to think of why he was acting
so...differently about and toward her, maybe it was the side effects
protoblood or something else-something else in which he was hoping
be, because it could not be. Whatever it was, it was in the past...the
cannot haunt someone like this. His only release was maybe in
the fact that
the robot can deny what his thoughts keep rambling him about for and
ease the pain of why he was acting a little differently these days.
hoping that robot would not let him down as the effects of the cold
finally started to take hold of him once more.
Meanwhile, in a slightly more closed and slightly more closer corner
universe, a man was sitting in front of a screen. Not just any
though, this one was special. So special, that it could pinpoint
visitors-or at least the ones from outer space. This one screen
being intently and deeply stared by one who wished he didn't, considering
that it was just as blank and empty now as it usually was every night
started to grow weary on the poor man until the most unexpected thing
to happen...he got a response. So excited was this poor man,
that he jumped
right out of his seat and rushed right over to the nearest telephone
called the person he was supposed to call right then and there, but
though that no one was going to believe this.
"Um...yeah...sorry to interrupt your night, sir....but...but...there's
something heading our way...obviously it's alien, sir. Well,
what do you
want me to do? Can I tell you anything about it...well", the
grabbing several sheets of paper, "I don't believe this, sir.
this spacecraft that's heading toward us...it's a bug, sir. This
is no joke,
sir. These configurations and dimension designs say it's a large
Very funny, sir..."
As he tried his damnedest to convince his "sir"
over the phone, one of
the louder background noises suddenly went silent, forcing him to rush
to check on it quickly before he rushed over to pick up the phone in
not believing yet again what he just discovered.
"Well, sir, it seems these "bug aliens" has made
their first move because
probe is gone. No, it's not the new and expensive one.
Well, I'm glad to
hear that you're happy about that, sir, but I'm worried now.
obviously destroyed our probe and that could obviously only mean thing,
Well, it means that they're not peaceful and the they're obviously
dangerous, and more importantly-they're getting closer by the second!"
Back at the other end of that small corner of the
universe, Stanley H.
was confused. Confused as to why this bug ship that was at his
make such a huge fuss over such a small object just to put it into
one of its
many stomachs and control its ever growing appetite. He tried
ship itself, but he didn't get much of an intelligent response on its
"Lexx, what was the point of that?"
"What do you mean, Stanley?"
"Why did go chasing all this way for some small...stupid
probe all the
way out in the middle of nowhere?"
"I was hungry, Stan."
"So, you probably threw us way off course for that?!
Well, I really hope
your happy, Lexx, not to mention I hope that was the best damn snack
ever dropped down your holes!"
"Actually, it was pretty funny tasting, Stan and
it still tickles my
insides real funny."
"Gee, thanks for sharing that, Lexx."
"You're welcome, Stan", it replied, making its captain
let out a heavy
sigh then slump back in his chair while he heard his traveling companion
mutter out some strange words in the process.
"What are you doing, robot?"
"Trying to call you an imbecile in all the languages
I can remember. A
very good way to kill the time, I might add."
"Well, geez, why don't you try spending your time
looking a suitable
planet instead so that I can have the pleasure of not being in your
anymore which would be real nice right now."
"Well, it seems we don't have to worry about that
"Oh, and why's that?"
"Because there's one right over there", 790 replied
with a sneer,
scanning over the sector to reveal the planet he was talking about,
close up to see that it was mostly water but had some huge land masses
"Yeesh! It doesn't even look intelligent.
Any signals or anything?"
"Just a bunch of mindless and gibberish transmissions,
nothing you'd ever
be interested in considering that it's way too intelligent for you."
"Well, in that case...Lexx, play some of those signals
for me", Stan
replied putting his hand to the control key and getting just wanted
That robot was right about one thing, most of the
stuff was just gibberish
welcomes and other assorted stuff he considered either too boring,
or too primitive for his taste until he happened to stumble on one
really seem to get his attention and then some. He told the ship
to clear up
all the static and focus more on that signal to get the full effect.
"Is that hardcore enough for you, baby?"
"Oh yessss, that's so hard for me, big daddy."
Stan was really interested in all they were saying-considering
really couldn't much understand them anyway-but the view was more than
incredible enough for him, or as much and as clear as he could receive
obviously for him to be interested it in this much, it just had to
involving porno. Gazing on at the lusty chick for a few more
the signal just suddenly went away and was replaced with something
interesting, he knew he had made up his mind right there and then.
going to get the walking corpse and the love slave and he was going
down to that planet, the one that just seemed to tempting to resist.
At the same time, back on the planet of temptation,
things did not seem so
pleasurable as all the important and hidden folks wearing the dull
were trying to decide what to do about the big bug that was heading
way. All those suits didn't know if it was friendly or a threat,
sudden destruction of their probe by that big bug pointed their opinions
toward the wrong direction, of course nothing was for certain until
in the leather chair behind the big wooden desk, who just happened
to be the
biggest suit of all, made his final decision.
"Okay, what do we know about this...thing?"
"Well, Mr. President, we do that it is a giant bug
ship for sure but we
also suspect that it's an organic ship-"
"Excuse me, son. Did you just say organic...like
this thing is alive?"
"Yes, sir, that's exactly what it means. These
diagnostics say that it
is also the size of Manhattan Island and is exactly the shape of a
"Is that all we know of it?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is, sir."
"Okay...but that doesn't tell me anything about
it being hostile or
friendly and certainly doesn't if we should roll out the red carpet
it straight to hell!"
"I say we give them more time, sir-"
"And I say we blow it!"
"General, can you please calm down? Maybe
if we give these aliens some
maybe they can prove themselves to be peaceful-"
"I don't think so, Doctor. Mr. President,
sir, if they destroyed our
probe, that obviously has to tell us something of their real intents.
we should be prepared just in case they try to do something to us!"
"Sir, I think the General is being a little overexcited-"
"And I think you're being too much of a pussy, doctor!"
"Enough! Shut up, the both of you! I
make the decisions here, not you
two so just shut up please!"
"Sorry, sir", the both replied at once before another
aide opened up the
door and showed up with a report in his hand.
"I'm also sorry to butt in, sir, but something big
has just happened
involving our new alien friends."
"Well, spit it out, kid."
"Callisto, one of the larger moons of Jupiter....or
at least I think it's
Jupiter...it could be Saturn-"
"The point, son...get to the damn point."
"Well, that ship...just blew it up."
"Yes, it seems it has the capability to blow up
planets at will."
"You see what I mean, sir", the General butted in,
"this just proves that
it's obviously a threat to us. Callisto was bigger than this
planet, and if
that...that...thing can blow that up with ease, imagine what it can
do to us!"
"I see your point, General, and I have to tend to
agree with you on this
"No buts, Doctor. This thing needs to be stopped.
Is there any thing
that can do the trick?"
"Well, sir, there are the new guidance missile we've
been testing as of
late. They have been successful in each one and I think that
they can do the
trick if this ship gets close enough."
"Do it, then. Get one of them ready for launch."
"Yes, sir", the General replied happily while the
scientist just sighed
aloud while the President just sat behind his desk and started to wonder
he did with every decision he made) if it was the right thing to do
Sitting there in his chair, being able only to sigh
aloud in impatience,
he thought more and more about the green and blue planet that was
irresistible to him, as he stood beside the others now having told
it and Xev just seemed to find it as tempting as he did while Kai really
no opinion on it but right along with 790, who was just trying to protect
darling Xev no matter regardless of what was happening, was more curious
to why the Lexx blew up a moon for no particular reason at all.
"Now what was that all about Lexx?"
"I was still hungry, Stan. It has been a while
since I've last eaten a
full meal and I need to replenish my energy, Stan."
"I see, Lexx, but can we get going now? I
want to reach that blue and
planet up ahead, the third one out from their sun. You think
you can do that
"As you request, Stan."
"Thank you, Lexx. Finally."
Cruising their way slowly through the galaxy to
avoid any more moving
and unnecessary distractions until they near the destination they finally
wanted to reach, passing by a small and rather ugly gray moon which
appease any of them at all, and they showed it.
"Ugh, how did such a pretty planet as that get stuck
with such an ugly
"Yeah, it looks like something bashed it in several
"Something did smash it in several times, retard.
There are craters all
over it to tell you that."
Not giving another thought, all of them just let
it go and headed to the
place they wanted to be, looking over its vast and straight land masses
bodies of water that surrounded up to the two slowly diminishing white
that were on top and the bottom of the lovely planet. Stan took
a huge sigh
and gloried over its beauty and rather the beauty of its people before
placing his hand to the control key to start a transmission, but it
that who alreay makes the rules there beat him to the punch because
a small, pointed object thrusting it way toward and no one knew what
"Hey, it seems that the welcome committee has arrived.
What the hell is
"Must be some sort of beacon or something", Xev
replied as she looked on
the robot head for answers.
"Your guess is as good as mine, sugar plume."
"Kai? What do you think?"
"I do not know either, but I am curious to find
It seems that the dead man was not the only one,
for the Lexx-still in
its feeding frenzy-swerved to the side once and sent the crew members
tumbling out of control as it headed straight toward whatever was coming
there way and swallowed it whole in one gulp before stopping and resuming
what it was doing before. All of the crew gathered themselves
making sure each other was all right but it did not last long for something
else, something worse happened inside the Lexx-its food came back to
as an explosion soon followed there after and the shaking became much
knocking all of them down at once along with several other things.
"What was that?"
"I don't know, but that beacon must have done something
to the Lexx."
"Well, obviously, Stan."
Unfortunately for, things went from bad to worse
when a hole blew itself
into the bridge and making the ship go in swirls, tossing and tumbling
crew left and right, up and down and through thick and thin, moving
objects as well along with the crypods, knocking several of them down
even cracking a couple of them as well. All four of them were
wonder when this nightmare was going to end, but the screen going blank
the lights going out didn't make them feel any better as the ship continued
to go haywire until mercy showed itself upon and finally stopped the
allowing the others to gather themselves up and try to figure out where
were before going to search for the others, hoping that they were as
one piece as they were.
Not feeling any of the swishing and the swoshing
of her make shift cage
until it rolled around like a log on the floor, Jaina realized that
had to be terribly wrong in or with the Lexx for something like this
happen, but then again it wasn't necessarily a bad thing. She
could this to
capitalize on her situation and more importantly, escape. Seeing
bonus in noticing that the cryo gas that was produced to keep her cold
escaping out through a crack in the glass, she placed her lips to the
and started to suck some air through her mouth and into her lungs,
making herself strong enough to break free from the case. Wriggling
around some more to make it more comfortable, her hand accidentally
her throat and felt a thin scar over it, noticing that someone had
cut through it several times to get something out of her. It
had to be the
assassin, she knew it had to be. They obviously must have found
that she bled the stuff that he needed to survive, which was protoblood,
she wondered if he could even take the stuff in without going haywire.
told herself that she was about to find out as rammed her fist through
glass top, proceeding to push the lid up slowly then crawling out of
shell, laughing gently to herself before letting out a sharp cry of
"freedom!" in an alien tongue before following it up with a piercing
scream of pleasure and pain.
Climbing her way up the levels of the Lexx by its
walls, Xev started to
wonder just exactly how far this ship knocked her down when a bigger
overtook her mind: how badly was the Lexx damaged by that little surprise
which the blue and green planet sent to them and how much it would
in the long run. Those thoughts and concerns kept running through
as she kept going up, finally pushing herself to the bridge above then
started to search the passengways and rooms for her lost friends and
killing one in the process as she suddenly found herself stepping on
She looked down to see Stanley clinging on to dear
life-not to mention
the ledge that she was standing on below her feet. His fingers
slip slowly until he was grasping for it with one hand which quickly
after and if not for Xev who quickly grabbed that hand before he fell,
knows what might have happened but no one would be able to control
so they wouldn't be able to go anywhere for sure.
"There you are, Stanely", she responded as she used
her strength to pull
him up from the ledge back onto his feet on the ground, "I see you've
"Cute...real cute", he retorted, releasing his grasp
from her knowing now
he was safe as least for now, "you've seen Kai or the head yet?"
"No, I just got here myself. You?"
"No, me neither. I hope they're well because
I have a bad feeling about
Lexx and when I get a bad feeling, bad things happen."
Stanley was ready to continue his spiel as they
headed toward the bridge
to check up on the ship itself when something else interrupted him,
and piercing shriek that seemed totally unnatural and really seemed
the pants out of them both.
"What was that? I don't like the sound of
"Well, I can tell what I think it is. It sounds
like something crawling
out of the dead to me."
"You're probably right on that. Come on, let's
get to the bridge...I'm
worried about the Lexx right now more than any of us."
"Yeah, you're right. This doesn't look good."
"I agree with you both."
Both of them turned their heads to see Kai walking
cautiously up to them,
carrying their missing robot head 790 as well, which seemed to be in
because all they saw was empty screen and while both of them were glad
Kai in one piece (which was no surprise to anyone but that didn't stop
from feeling that way), all of them were concerned about 790 as they
themselves to the bridge, but something else started to plague Stan's
once more and he tired to bring it back up as quickly as he could.
"Look what I found."
"790", Xev replied, taking the head from Kai, shaking
it in order to
revive the machine but had no such luck, "wake up. What's wrong
"790 must have taken more of a fall than we did.
I shall try to revive
him when we have a better idea of what the condition of the Lexx is."
"That's another thing! Did you hear that loud
shriek earlier, Kai? That
noise that made my skin crawl."
"Yes, I did."
"Well, what do you think it was?"
"I am guessing it was probably a cry of pain or
something from the Lexx in
response to what happened."
"Yeah, well, I'm not so sure of that."
Staying silent the rest of the way their, all three
arrived at the bridge
to a less that cordial and hopeful response. Instantly noticing
a hole in
the floor, Xev and Kai ran over to look over it while Stanley took
minded 790 and laid it beside the control chair before placing his
the key and stared on at the blank screen.
"Lexx, how are you feeling?"
"Not well, Stanley. My insides are burning."
"What do you mean burning?"
"I mean that my body is burning inside and it is
slowly starting to hurt
me more, Stan."
"Oh yeah, that's not good."
"What is your status now, Lexx?"
"There is severe damage in my digestive system and
it's getting worse,
"Well, can you get the lights back on so we can
see better, Lexx?"
"As you request, Stan", it replied before the lights
slowly came back on,
exposing the damage to itself more while Stan and Xev turn to Kai for
"Is there anything we can do?"
"I do not know that."
"Well, that's just great-"
"But they might", Kai responded, pointing down to
the blue and green
globe below, "if they sent this thing...this weapon, they might have
a way to
fix what damage it has caused to the Lexx. If we do not, the
effects of this
weapon may cause serious damage because right now he may be slowly
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! You're telling me that
this thing is killing the Lexx
because of a serious case of heartburn?"
"If you can put it that way."
"So, I guess we just have to go and get it some
"Okay", Stan replied, jumping out of his chair and
headed toward Kai,
"then we should go right away, the sooner the better."
"Wait a second", Xev interrupted, "what about me?"
"I am afraid you'll have to stay here and look over
the ship while we are
gone since 790 is not activating-"
"It's all right, Xev", Stan replied in Kai's place,
"if this is going to
be our new home after all, you won't be missing much. As soon
as we can fix
Lexx right up, we'll go back down there and you can do all the exploring
"Yeah sure", Xev smiled hastily as Stan handed her
"Thanks, Xev", Stan replied as he and Kai were already
on the way out,
"maybe you should check around the rest of the ship...you know to kill
"Sure thing, Stan", she replied as her smile faded
away and her expression
turned into that of like a child being let out of something good, then
deciding to take Stan's advice and check around for more damaged areas
ship, but not for his sake, as she picked up a shovel nearby for protection,
but rather to make herself feel just a little bit better for the cause.
Arriving at the moth as hastily as they could, Kai
and Stan were sure of
what had to be done, but had no idea on where to start or on how to
because they were strangers in an even stranger land and they had no
what was laying wait for them, but for the sake of the ship, the being,
took them this far and will probably take even further, they had to
at least in thanks for what it do for them if not much more.
necessarily ready for what was in store for them, but at least they
face with at least a strong chin if much else. Trying to decide
on where to
start first, they decided to turn to the one thing that got them this
far in first place-the transmissions.
"Do you remember anything you heard from earlier,
"Just the important stuff."
"All the porno stuff."
"That isn't important, Stanley."
"Well, it is to me!"
"Do you remember anything else on them?"
"Oh, it was just a bunch of gibberish. You
know, news and stuff."
"What such news?"
"Oh, like they have these "astronauts" and military
like guys finally
discover life in space. Ha! Talk about primitive!"
"Yeah, like they were having this big summit in
their capital. Supposed
to get them one step closer to world peace an all of that."
"Do you remember the name of it?"
"Yeah, but I also know that I really don't want
to go there. It sounds
really boring. I think it starts with a W or something..."
"Do you know where this city is?"
"Oh yeah, from what I saw, they said that it was
on the western side of
the planet with a small vertical strip down the middle and-wait, there
Stan pointed to which continent he was talking about
before Kai took a
nose dive through the planet's thick atmosphere and headed closer to
Stan was talking about, getting more and more help in his quest from
comrade as they went along.
"That's it-that's the city! I knew it started
with a W", Stan screamed
happily, "it sure has several nice white big houses. Too bad
you can't see
it in the dark. Do you think anyone has seen us land down?"
"Fortunately, no. We have to keep our cover
or be hunted down, and we
cannot afford that."
"I guess not", Stan replied back before they landed
down quietly into a
big grassy patch that Kai made sure was hidden so no one could spot
easily, both of them getting out quietly and shutting the lids before
noticed a big sign up ahead, "welcome to Washington, DC. What
a silly name
for a city? Of course, the name of their planet isn't too beautiful
"You know where we are, Stan?"
"Of course, silly, I know where we are. We're
on some planet called
Completely tired and desperately bored, Xev realized
that the one major
burden about being on the Lexx was that it surely didn't help you kill
unless you had the key, which she didn't. Thinking that the passageways
corridors of the massive ship could provide her with some sort of
entertainment, but not they showed enough signs of danger to keep her
interested, which certainly wasn't making things easier. Sadly,
wasn't doing much better considering. She kept hearing its moans
of pain and
groans of illness and she couldn't but feel sorry for it and mad at
herself for being so selfish. Continuing to side step through
brushing the flat end of the shovel against the wall as she did while
to find anywhere to be, the ship let out it most painful moan yet and
could help but try to do something to stop it.
"How are you feeling?"
"Not good...the burning is getting worse.
I am in great pain."
"I understand that, Lexx, but Stan and Kai will
be back soon to help and
to make it go away."
"I hope so. I need it badly."
"I know you do, Lexx...we all do."
"What was that?"
"Nothing, Lexx. Just relax, help is on its
Letting out another heavy sigh in uneasiness, another
and even more
depressing though suddenly entered her mind: what if they had to leave?
the Lexx died, what would they do...what could they do? The thought
having to go from the ship that's been their home for so long scared
deeply and caused her to shudder-but what if Kai or Stan didn't prevail
time? Anything could happen then. Stan and her would have
to leave and
start over on that planet for sure, while 790 would probably want to
them, of course. Kai, on the other hand, would probably feel
that if he
could find a way to finally fulfill his wish and die truly and in peace,
would probably welcome the Lexx dying along with him. Trouble
was, it may
explode or anything like that to keep Kai from not dying...it could
drift there forever, and what would that leave him? No, he would
have to go
with them if the worst came to pass, besides, it wouldn't be right
Now motivated to do something, she decided to start
being prepare and
quickly headed to the cryo room to get the stuff ready. Thinking of
stuff to pack up first and what had to be carried more carefully
had to be left behind as she rushed over to where she was going to
packing, Xev raced to the cryo pods-shovel still in hand-expecting
damage from what had happened earlier, but still not counting on the
surprises that were coming her way. Looking over the
damaged beaks and vases from the lab along with several of the medical
equipment that shorted out and damaged itself from various sources
finally the crypods themselves, sneaking up closer to them and noticing
one of them had fallen down flat on its back, shattering itself into
what really grabbed her attention though was the other, more strange
noticeable open hole right in the middle, which she crouched down to
much better look at it, glacing it over carefully and giving it her
attnetion and curiousity-not of course, noticing the hand that slowly
reaching for her shoulder from behind until she felt it and snapped
to see, in shock and confusion, an old enemy from behind.
"Hiya, Xev. Miss me?"
Not giving her the chance to answer her question
or confirm her surprise,
Jaina quickly punched her in the face, knocking her unconscious before
hoisting Xev up over her shoulder and heading to the control panel,
the knobs and switches back and forth, which did nothing until she
banged the panel on its side before it actually did anything, making
the remaining doors open up before Jaina carried her new victim over
and put her inside, shutting the door once more before she had the
get up, smiling all the way as she did.
"It's only fair, hon", Jaina replied slyly as she
quietly walked around
and spotted her weapons on the floor near the fallen lab table, picking
up before looking over the place, either thinking that they haven't
been doing a good job of keeping the place tidy or that something happened,
"wow, heh, what catastrophe happened here?"
Chuckling a little to herself before heading on
down the hallways and
ignoring the sounds around her, she kept playing with her lethal toys
slowly cruising toward the bridge, wondering where her other captors
the same time.
"Hmmmmmm, Dead Boy? Captain Tweedledumb?
Robot Head? I got your little
woman in the ice box!" Hello?! Mmmm, must have gone on
a field trip or
something. Eh, oh well. More room for me", she replied
to herself as
finally reached the bridge and went to took the empty captain's chair
she noticed something else different about the people here, kneeling
see the empty and nonfunctional 790-but then again, she didn't know
"well, well, well. Hello robot head. How you been doing
Not noticing any activity yet, she waved her hand
up and down in front of
its big eye screens to grab its attention, only to get nothing again-which
she really didn't have a problem with anyway.
"Well, no one home, eh? Oh well", she replied,
kicking it aside a little
more to make room for her in the chair, then realizing that the ship
respond to her unless she made a couple changes, like into a different
more specifically Stan's.
"Lexx", she asked in his tone, "what's your status?"
"Not good, Stanley. I am getting worse...it
"What hurts, Lexx?"
"The burning inside me...it hurts really bad."
"Oh, I see. Well, have we heard anything from
the planet yet?"
"No, Stanley. We received several random transmissions,
but no one has
"Oh, I see, what kind of transmissions?"
"I don't know."
"Well, are any of them digital?"
"I think so, Stan."
"Good, can you tap into those signals and then look
up anything on that
planet...it's history and science and stuff like that, and keep it
me fast if you do?"
"It is a strange request...but as you command, Stan."
Smiling heavily as the Lexx began to flash rapid
and heavy of the facts
and history of the planet below, all of it leaving an interested glance
her face as the ship kept turning page after page of information on
screen in front of her.
Back on the planet Earth, dawn began to break out
into the sky and with
it both Kai and Stan arose to it, one already there because he never
sleep in the first place and the other not so agreeable to it even
dead one persisted him physically by repeatedly kicking him lightly
shoulder to wake him up, which did not sit well with Stan who was still
trying to get back those pleasan dreams he finally had before hand,
eventually he had to give and finally wake up because he knew Kai wouldn't
quit until he did.
"All right", Stan replied groggily, "just stop kicking
me, would you?"
"What would be the point?"
"I didn't think there was one to begin with", Stan
replied, wanting to
get the rest of his clothes on but wouldn't do so until Kai turned
which he did easily, "so, what's the plan? I suppose you have
"I suggest we go find the ones who shot that missile
to our ship and see
if we can find a way to reverse it."
"Oh, that's much easier said than done, and just
where exactly do we find
"I do not know", Kai responded, looking up at the
proud city surrounding
before turning back to face a fully clothed Stan, "I suggest we go
Fortune treated the two travelers a bit more kindly
as the day passed,
giving them both leads as they passed through the humoungous capital
passing by all kinds of people that grabbed their attention in different
as they searched for a way to save the Lexx, but sadly not getting
anything as hours later into the day, they both found themselves in
of the city with nothing to help their cause plus the fact that they
didn't know where to go but the good news was that they figured out
understand the maps and had a better idea of what to do now as they
in daylight and amongst the crowd in front of a phone booth with Stan
searching through the big, heavy yellow paged book that went with it
Kai stood beside him with his ear pressed to the phone, trying to contact
someone of influence still to no luck as he hung up to try again.
"Kai, will you give it up already, that's like the
fifth one you called."
"I know, but we must keep going and besides, we're
almost out of change."
"Oh, we got all the change we need", Stan replied
looking down at the
busted bottom part of the machine that held the change in it, "not
would do us much good, that was the last scientist mentioned in this
thing here. Maybe we should try something else...like a lab or
"That could work...you should look one up."
"No need", Stan replied, grabbing Kai's attention
and pointing to some
big building nearby, "Smithsonian Institute...that's got to have some
wigs cranium cramming freaks in there."
"Agreed, but it is across the street so we must
go the nearest place to
cross." "Oh come on, all the way over there,
why can't we just cut across
"Because Stanley, we do not want to be caught and
we must follow their
not to", Kai replied already on his way there with Stan quickly following
"Party pooper", Stan replied as he went along, noticing
that others were
staring at both of them and giggling at them as they passed which began
irk the poor captain, "and is it just me or do these people think we're
little strange for their taste or what?"
As they approached the crosswalk, nearing even stranger
people as Kai
reached his hand to activate the signal button, it seemed that the
people had more interest in them then they did as they all stared on
both of them with curiosity and hilarity while all Stan and Kai could
was that they were dressed up like women, and quite badly at that.
studied each of one them carefully while avoiding them as politely
could, two of them with bad wigs and tattoos while one has all sorts
piercings sticking out all over the orifices of his body, another one
had a mustache on him which just made Stanley laugh in hysterics
while all of them seemed to take more notice of Kai and completely
captain as they moved closer to gander at the assasins own strange
"Oh honey, look at this. Where did you ever
get a beehive like that,
sugar? That has just got to be most fabulous one I've ever seen."
"Like for sure."
"It is my own hair. It's grown since I was
"Well, I must know your beauty secrets."
"Uh, excuse me", Stan interrupted, "but why are
you guys dressed like a
of cheap, overworn sluts? Not to mention that you really need
to shave, sir."
"Well, I never", the one drag queen Stan insulted
replied with a heavy
"Honey, it's not just dress up, it's a state of
mind because you see,
unlike you, we are beautiful."
"Sing it, girlfriend!"
"Besides", the head drag queen replied poking at
Stan's shirt, "what's
your get up supposed to be? Last time I checked it wasn't Halloween
"What are you blabbering on about now? And...and...and
this is not my
get up! It's my uniform and I earned every bit of it!"
"Uniform? For what, honey? The Guild
Of Tacky Colored Wearing Men?"
"No! It's for the Divine Order."
"Oh, the Divine Order, well honey, it's obviously
got to be divine if
they make you wear stuff like that."
"Why you", Stan angrily replied while the others
laughed at him, ready to
strike one of them in return had it not been for Kai, who grabbed in
in just the nick of time and grabbed his attention again.
"That light says we can cross now."
"Well, good. See you later, you freaks."
"Well, goodbye to you too, tacky boy", one of them
replied as the others
laughed behind him, "hey, pale face, if you ever need any hair tips
plenty to give me in return...you know I'll never be afraid to listen
you can get back to me any time on that, sugar. Okay?"
"Yeah, right", Stan mutter under his breath as they
approached the other
side of the street, "well, that was an interesting acquaintance."
"To say the least. These beings tend to be
more experimental than others
that we've encountered."
"Or just more freaky", Stan replied, "but of course,
I'm still not
suprised that they'd pay more attention to you and your hair than they
me, but then again everybody seems to pay more attention to you.
get a lot of popularity for...a corpse..."
Stan wanted to rant to keep his friend's attention
more focused and vent
out his own feelings at the same time, but slowly noticed that Kai's
attention was now refocused on something he thought was more important,
turned out to be a big metal box containing some big mass of paper
small amount of print covering along with a small picture on the side.
was wondering what the thing while Kai was already halfway through
the front page, which really began to get to Stan.
"Oh, what is it now, Kai?"
"Stan, this newspaper...it can help us."
"What are you talking about now?"
"This front page article...it talk about the scientist
the alien craft heading toward this planet."
"You mean Lexx?"
"Precisely. If there is anyone in this city
who can help us, it is most
likely that it is him."
"Well, that's great. However, we don't know
who he is, where he is, or
how we can get to him?"
"Well, it says here that his name is Dr. Joseph
Emerson, that he lives
somewhere in this city and I presume that he would be as eager to help
as much we need it because it also says here that he was against their
launching an attack against us."
"Okay, let's go."
"We still have the problem of where to find him-"
"Ha, solved that. Thanks to that phone book,
I know that he lives way on
the other side of the city, so I suggest we get started considering
no money to afford transportation."
"We can catch that big vehicle over there", Kai
replied holding up a big
wad of change in his hand then pointing to a bus with the other hand,
believe they take exact change."
"Kai, I don't know or care what I would do without
you, but things would
sure be less easy. Come on, let's go find this Emerson character
things get any worse."